Thursday, March 13, 2008

lets pretend they are black

We all have those certain items of clothing that we normally would not be caught dead in. Or the shirt/pants/socks are only still holding a spot in the closet or drawer because it is a fall back. A crutch. Or we would normally never mix those items of clothing together forming a head turning outfit (thats the bad kind of head turning people). Most women have those granny panties and men have holey boxers that we only wear on........LAUNDRY DAY!!!

Ah, yes laundry day! Does the simple saying of the phrase make you want to jump up and down and break out into song and dance!?!?!?
No?
Yeah. Come to think of it. Laundry day is only acceptable because without it I would never have clean clothes of any sort.
Laundry day sucks.
Yes, it is easy to wash clothes. Stuff as much as you can into the washing machine. Add soap and turn on. Easy.
It is easy to dry clothes in the same fashion.
But what I hate...what I loathe....is the putting away the product of laundry day-I speak to you of clean clothes.

Again, easy enough, right? Fold the clothes out of the dryer and put them away.
Put them away.
Put them away.
I have been known to live out of my laundry basket full of clean clothes because I hate putting them away. Which isnt all bad because I save all that time (about 4 minutes, right?) NOT putting laundry away.

Let us speak of the days leading up to laundry day. Most of us work during the day or have a daytime wardrobe of sorts. I have certain shirts I wear with certain pants to work. I do have variations on this but I have the normal amount of work clothing. The days leading up to laundry day are spent finding out when is the last possible day you can do laundry and planning outfits accourdingly.
Case in point, my thought process for this week:
Monday morning - Wow, I am down to 2 pairs of pants (yes I wore 1 of them last week, but I didnt spill anything on them so they are 'clean') and 3 shirts. Need to do laundry soon.
Tuesday morning - Shit! Im outta work socks...I didnt even think to check their status. Looks like its a day for the new Mary Janes I bought. Lets pray that they match my remaining outfits.
Wednesday morning - Fuck I forgot Im outta work socks! Okay...what other shoes can I wear without socks in the month of March...Aha! My new brown bow ones! YES! Really MUST do laundry tonight!
Thursday morning - Fuckity fuck fuck fuck! Didnt do laundry last night. I DID watch a movie and eat 2 huge cookies though!
Okay....**My mind races and I struggle to think of which clean clothes I have available to me**
I only have one pair of pants that isnt stretched out or dirty. My dark navy blue pinstripes. I actually thought they were black when I bought them and I keep convincing myself of this. So I pull out my only acceptable shirt to wear to work. Dark heather gray. Okay. It is a somewhat acceptable outfit for laundry day (I hope). Okay....socks, socks, socks, socks. Hm. Dirty. I did find my black socks with the cowboy boots on them!! We will pretend that the pants are black and that flashing cowboy boots when I cross my legs is perfectly acceptable in a professional establishment such as the U.
I feel flashy in this dark outfit with yellow, red and torquoise cowboy boots on my socks itching to show themselves. With every step I take, every swish of my pants the boots jump out and scream 'Its laundry day! Its laundry day!'

Luckily enough I have had enough perfectly cute undies to get me through laundry day (errr...week) so I have not had to resort to the ugly granny panties saved for just such an occasion.

Note to self: Do laundry tonight.

Actually. I have plans tonight with my girls. And unless I come home after and do laundry (doubt it!) Ill have to scrounge for cleanish clothes.

Hell, laundry is over rated as are clean clothes.
And I think my halloween socks are clean...and tomorrow is dress down day.

I just saved myself 4 minutes.

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